This turned out to be my last morning on the trail. I hadn't slept well all night, and awoke with a stuffy head, and a very puffy, pasty face. All my energy was gone, and my knees ached. I knew I was really in trouble when I couldn't even choke down a little bowl of grits for breakfast. Mahoosuc Notch was only two miles away, and that would take a lot more than I had at the moment.

Everyone was up and around early this morning in anticipation of the big day. Spaz, Tumbles and Rob were the first to head out. They had a mail pick up midday, so wanted to allow enough time. We left at 6:45, but within a few minutes, I knew I would have to make a tough decision. I was moving at a snail's pace, and each step was painful. Brandon was all jazzed up for tackling Mahoosuc Notch. He's been talking about it since Springer. This is an awful time for me to fall apart. But, if I did go on, it would slow them down to the point of being miserable too. By the top of Fulling Mill Mtn, I made the decision to break away at the blue blaze approach trail, just before the Notch. I was very relieved when Ronald came to the same conclusion, and calmly asked me, "Do you need to get off the trail for a few days?" I told him that as much as I wanted to go on, I didn't think I could.

We slowly picked our way don’t the last steep descent to the entrance of the Notch. We explained the situation to Brandon. He felt bad for me, but I know that he was relieved we weren't all getting off the trail. I could see how much he wanted to go on. We sorted through the food and gear to make sure they had everything they needed. After hugs and kisses, and a promise to see them in Rangeley at the end of the week, I watched them walk away

My plan was to take the Mahoosuc Notch approach trail back to Success Pond Road, then hitch into Gorham, and eventually get to Rangeley by shuttle. Bruce from Hiker's Paradise had told us that Success Pond Road was a good gravel road that wasn't widely traveled, but there were people who lived out there, and there were trailheads for several trails, so eventually someone would come along.

The trail out was about two miles. It was nearly flat, which helped me immensely. It followed a lovely stream the entire way, and even in my current condition, I thoroughly enjoyed the serene beauty of the area. Plus, it provided some respite from the rocks, and some quiet time to reflect. I met two large groups of day hikers headed up to do the Notch. They said if I had no luck getting a ride, they'd take me when they came back. I hoped I didn't have to wait that long, but it was a comfort to know that in the worst case scenario, I could just hang out and write in my journal for a few hours and wait for them to finish their hike.

As it turned out, my wait was only five minutes. I came out of the woods, past the parking lot, then down the .3 mile drive to the road. I walked up the road a couple hundred yards to find a visible spot. A light rain began to fall, and I was looking for some trees for a little cover, when a pick-up truck appeared. I stuck out my thumb, and the truck pulled over. The man behind the wheel was a local from Berlin who had taken the day off to scout out moose hunting spots for the fall. His name was Robert Goulet. No kidding! He said, "Just tell people you met Robert Goulet, only I don't sing or dance!" At first he was only going to take me as far as the highway in Berlin, but the more we talked, and the harder the rain came down, the more sympathetic he became. I told him I'd be happy to pay him to take me into Gorham, but he said, "I was already fixin' to do that! I figured that after all you've done this summer, it's the least I can do." So, he dropped me right at the front door of Hiker's Paradise. When I tried to pay him for his extra trouble, he wouldn't hear of it. I thanked him for his kindness, and he drove off into the rain.

My emotions were a mixture of pain and defeat, but also a sense of gratitude for being delivered safely back to this refuge. All the way out on the trail this morning, my simple prayer had been, "Thank you Lord, for providing a safe way off the trail exactly when I needed it, and keep us all safe this week until we're back together." Our guardian angels continue to watch over us.

The kindness continued as I walked into the motel office. Mary Ann greeted me warmly with "You're back, you look like you need to rest." I told her what happened, and that I needed some R&R. She quickly got my towel and sheets, and told me to go upstairs, get clean, and take a nap. That's exactly what I did. When I woke up several hours later, I felt less stuffy, but I still didn't have any strength.

Spent the rest of the day just resting and writing. Couldn't have done much else if I wanted to. Mary Ann later told me she specifically picked out pastel flowered sheets for their soothing effect. It's kind of a joke among hikers about the sheets at Hiker's Paradise. Most of them are probably old sheets of Adam's (Bruno and Mary Ann's 12 year old), because they sport designs such as Batman, ET, ALF, racecars, and various other cartoon characters and superheroes. Last Saturday, when we were here with such a huge crowd, there were several discussions about who had the coolest sheets.

After a great dinner of salmon and corn on the cob, I retired to my bunk for the evening. Didn't feel much like socializing. Fortunately, there are only a few people here tonight, so I have a room to myself.

There are days on the trail that go along way to help to define who we are, days that take us to new highs or lows both physically and emotionally. Today we hit both extremes both physically and emotionally. For me, it certainly will go down as one of the worst days. Yet, at the same time there were many highs.

We awoke early this morning in anticipation of today's hike through the famed Mahoosuc Notch. It didn't take long to realize something was wrong. Linda was not feeling good and her face was swollen. During breakfast she had a difficult time eating more than a few bites. We packed up as usual hoping that she would begin to feel better after hiking awhile.

Most of the Fab Four had left before us and Tumbles passed on the climb up Fulling Mountain. We tried to keep the pace slow so Linda had a chance to settle in. However, on the descent to the notch, it became clear that Linda's problem was more serious than we thought. Linda was making her way down the steep rocky trail in obvious pain. Besides not feeling well, her knees were causing her problems. I was getting concerned about her ability to do the notch and the climb up the Mahoosuc Arm to follow.

I guess we both instinctively recognized the need for her to leave the trail. I was reluctant to suggest it for fear that she may think I just wanted her to get off so we could hike faster. When I finally suggested it, I think she was relieved. I was glad she would be able to get off and get some needed rest, but at the same time I was sad. This is a particularly interesting section of the trail and we had talked about it for months. I was also beginning to feel a little guilty. It is obvious that much of her condition was due to our pushing the last couple of weeks to maintain our schedule through the Whites.

We stood at the entrance to the Notch sorting out our gear in an awkward silence. Not really know what to say. We were heading on and she would be leaving. Or plan is to have her rejoin us in a few days in Rangeley and continue North. But if her knees don't get better, this could well be the end of her adventure. After a few hugs, kisses and attempts at reassuring words, Brandon and I turned and headed into the Notch. Linda turned for the road and Gorham.

For weeks we had anticipated today's hike. Most hikers consider the Mahoosuc Notch as the hardest single mile on the AT. Set in a narrow gap between two towering mountains, the notch is little more than a pile of house size boulders that have come to rest here over thousands of years. There is no real trail through the notch. Instead the blazes painted on the boulders give you a rough idea of the best way to proceed. Is up to you to pick the best way over, under or around the boulders. Because it is at the bottom of a canyon, there is little sunshine and warmth to melt the snow. As a result pockets of snow and ice can be found under boulders late into summer. It's like waking through a giant maze set inside a refrigerator.

The time needed to negotiate this one-mile maze varies greatly. It can generally be done in 1 to 1.5 hours. Although many people take much longer, especially if the weather is unfavorable. We made it through in one hour while the Fab Four took 2.5 hours. I try to make a game out of it by hiking the whole way without taking my pack off. So far I've successfully done it twice.

This time Brandon and I would be entering the notch without Linda. In about ten minutes we caught up with Cowboy's group and hiked the rest of the way with them. Later we caught up with the Fab Four as they tried to overcome the various obstacles. We managed to exit the notch not too worse for wear. I did pick up a nice eighteen-inch scratch on my leg when an attempt to scale a boulder failed.

Following the notch and a short break, we started our assent of Mahoosuc Arm. It is a steep climb with many sections on steeply angled rock slabs. There is little one can to but trust the gripping power of your boot soles and the strength of the roots dangling along the rocks. During the climb, I took out my frustration of Linda's absence, by climb as hard and fast as possible. I was determined to push as long and hard as I could without stopping. That wasn't easy to do, as there were at least two groups with at ten people each coming down the hill. Everyone coming down seemed to want to know how far to the bottom. By now my stock reply was "Hopefully a lot farther than from the top."

I hadn't realized how hard I'd pushed until Brandon arrived. He was behind me on the climb, but I wasn't worried because he was in good hands. When he arrived, he was visibly shaken. He had tried his best to keep up to me. When he found he couldn't, he got very frustrated. It's the first time on the whole trip that he's been the slightest bit upset with the hike. After a brief pause and some comforting words, he resumed his normal position out in front. We proceeded on to Speck Pond for lunch. By the time we stopped for lunch, we hadn't hiked a lot of miles, but those we had were hard.

This afternoon we had a much easier climb up Old Speck and descent into Grafton Notch. Once in the notch we met a group of ATC people from the conference in nearby Bethel. They were out for one of their AT hikes. We got some cold drinks and fruit as a treat. By the time we were ready to depart for Baldpate Lean-to, the Fab Four had arrived. Smoking Joe slammed down his pack, swearing to never hike another foot of the AT. Obviously today's hike had been hard for more than just Brandon. By then Brandon was fully recovered and ready to hike more.

As usual of late, this evening shelter is overrunning with thru-hikers. One couple from last night (Pepie and Little Moe) turned out to be fellow thru-hikers. He'd gotten off the trail for a few days to attend a wedding. When he returned, he looked too clean to be a thru-hiker. They were quiet last night as they tried to remain anonymous.

After dinner, we were too full to eat our desert, so as usual we looked for volunteers. We never really had to look far, because Jell-O Instant Pudding was always a favorite treat. Rare Back and Cowboy offered to relieve us of the extra weight. When I handed Rare Back the little wire whisk we use to mix the pudding, he commented that they had a similar whisk that they left in the hiker box at The Blueberry Patch months ago. I commented that we picked up this whisk there so this must have been the one they dropped off. I think it a strange coincidence for it to come home after all this time and distance.

Linda wherever you are tonight, I hope you're well.

Today we woke up and mom didn’t feel too good.  Her face was all puffed out and she was having trouble eating her grits. When we started on the two miles to the Mahoosuc Notch. Mom did not trust herself on the rocks. When we got to the notch, mom decided that she had to get off the trail for a few days. We shuffled things around in the backpacks then said goodbye to mom and took off. I was sad to see mom go, but I didn’t want her to hurt herself.  And if she had stayed, it would have been no fun for us with her going real slow.

We got through the Notch in about 50 minutes then took a break for a while before heading up the Mahoosuc Arm. After a while we started up the arm and my back was hurting me. Dad had zoomed on ahead and left me behind. Soon Cowboy, Creeper, Easy 8, Whispering Pine, and Rob passed me and I was in the back by myself. I just kept on hiking hoping that I was close to the top. When I finally got to the top dad was waiting for me. We continued on to Speck Pond where we had lunch. Afterward we climbed Speck before heading on once again down the other side. The trail down was five miles long and seamed to go on forever. When we got to the road, we were given some drinks by some day hikers. After a break we took off for Baldpate Lean-to. When we got there we set out our stuff and then ate and talked till we went to bed.